Finding True Love in L.A.

Healthy advice about dating in Los Angeles from a longtime Angeleno friend of mine: "If the best that Charlize Theron can do here is Sean Penn, that should tell you something."

We Screamed, Screamed For Our Lives! And Loved Every Second of It!- LACMA'S William Castle Retrospective

How often do you leave a theater drunk with the sheer joy of what you've just experienced? I'm dazed and dizzy from the opening night of LACMA's William Castle Festival, a screening of Castle's inimitable The Tingler. The Museum pulled out all the stops in ways that would warm the long-dead director's heart: staff members were dressed as nurses and doctors at the entrance, and patrons were offered photo ops with a life-size Tingler. Castle's daughter, Terry, did a hilarious Q & A before the film began with another Tingler sitting on her lap. 

The audience's response was INCREDIBLE--this B-picture, over fifty years old and originally shot in two weeks, killed tonight. The totally receptive audience went berserk, won-over by Castle's and star Vincent Price's charisma and charm, and by the movie's sheer wonderful ludicrousness. When Price begged the viewers to "scream, scream for their lives," we all did. . . When the end title came up, we cheered and applauded madly, completely enamored of the bizarre catharsis of laughter and screaming we had communally experienced. Sheer, epic, unrelenting FUN. 

And I won a Tingler t-shirt. All for five bucks. 

THANK YOU, WILLIAM CASTLE!!!!!!!

THANK YOU, LACMA!!!!!!!

I can't recommend this series highly enough--for further information, check out LACMA's own Castle page:

http://www.lacma.org/series/let-there-be-fright-william-castle-scare-classics

A Message to the Family of WILLIAM CAMERON MENZIES, Wherever You Are

Earlier this year, the great movie production designer/director William Cameron Menzies (Gone With the Wind, Things to Come, The Sea Wolf, ad infinitum) was inducted into the Society of Illustrators' Illustrators Hall of Fame. Sadly, the Society was unable to locate any members of Mr. Menzies's family to present his award to. I am posting this message-in-a-bottle in the hopes that one of Menzies's descendants will read this and contact me. If you are out there and reading this, write to me via this blog and I will put you through to the appropriate parties.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Father's Day, indeed!

"Rick is dead! The People's Poet is dead!" R.I.P. Rik Mayall.

"This house will become a shrine, and punks and skins and rastas will all gather 'round and hold their hands in sorrow for their fallen leader. And all the grown-ups will say, 'But why are the kids crying?' And the kids will say, 'Haven't you heard? Rick is dead! The People's Poet is dead!'"

British TV comedy has lost one of its leading lights today, Rik Mayall, who has died at 56. Mayall's series "The Young Ones" was television's dark Yellow Submarine--unfettered imagination at work, where literally anything could happen at anytime--and Mayall was its rudder. His character, Rick, was the epitome of the worthless, trendy, self-important collegiate "radical" who can't do wrong right. Whether fantasizing about his superhero alter ego, "The People's Poet", or getting pummeled by his roommate Vyvyan's mum, Rick embodied the worst attributes of the pretentious scenesters of his own era and today. Half of the imbeciles wandering around Williamsburg, Brooklyn could be Rick's twins.

His performances were priceless.

"What the Devil Hath Joined Together"- Thanks for the kind words

I'm pleased and flattered by the warm critical reception that my visual essay, "What the Devil Hath Joined Together", from Arrow Video's Blu-Ray of Brian De Palma's SISTERS, has been receiving. Here are some of the notices:

I was delighted to be name-checked and to get some praise from my favorite British paper, The Guardian:

http://www.theguardian.com/film/2014/jun/22/sisters-review-philip-french-brian-de-palma-hitchcock

“Arrow stack the disc with plenty of new extras. 'What the Devil Hath Joined Together: Brian De Palma's Sisters' is a magnificent 47-minute visual essay by author Justin Humphreys (Names You Never Remember, With Faces You Never Forget.) It covers a lot and is almost as complete as a full commentary.”
- DVDBeaver.com

“Next up are a pair of video essays by film critics Justin Humphreys (on the production, references, and influence of Sisters) and Mike Sutton (on De Palma's career as a whole). Running 50 minutes and 30 minutes respectively, that sounds like it might be a slog, but both are incredibly informed, detailed, and entertaining pieces that fill in plenty of gaps about the making of the film and De Palma's career.”
- Fangoria.com

“Arrow has also provided a nice collection of extras that include an excellent documentary `What the Devil Hath Joined Together: Brian De Palma's Sisters' - A visual essay by author Justin Humphreys.”
- Cinemaretro.com

“Content wise, `What the Devil Hath Joined Together: Brian De Palma's Sisters' is a detailed account of the `making of' Sisters and an insightful analysis of the film.”
- 10KBullets.com

“Two thumping great video essays (voice-over plus stills and some movie clips) make up the meat of the extras. Justin Humphreys's What the Devil Hath Joined Together is an exhaustive 46-minute look at Sisters, exploring its themes, leitmotifs, casting and Hitchcockian ingredients.”
- TheLeastPictureShow.wordpress.com (Julian White)

“As always, Arrow contextualise the film exceedingly well, although compared to previous releases some of the wonderful interviews feel cut short, for whatever reason that might be.  We get two excellent video essays voiced by critics Justin Humphreys on Sisters and Mike Sutton on DePalma's career, five interviews with actress Jennifer Salt, writer Louisa Rose, editor Paul Hirsch, unit manager Jeffrey Hayes, and actor William Finley (via an audio-only interview), a trailer and promotional material gallery. . . The visual essays prove to be almost as good as a commentary. . . with excellent points made by both Humphreys and Sutton.”
- TheDarkSideMagazine.com

“Another improvement over the Criterion DVD is the special features, which were only text based in the former edition. Arrow has actually put together some great new material here, starting with a rather lengthy visual essay by Justin Humpheys entitled What the Devil Has Joined Together. This 47-minute piece covers the film's production history in rather extensive detail while also going over the various influences that made their way into the film. He also covers the development of De Palma's visual language, as displayed throughout the film, focusing on the editing and various visual tricks, including the use of the split screen. He examines some of De Palma's work from around that time, including Greetings and Hi, Mom , and talks at length about the performers he worked with during this period. He also of course examines the film's music, and then even points out the many technical mistakes (most of which are related to the film's low budget.) Taking the place of a commentary I found it a rather thorough and illuminating examination of the film and De Palma's early career.”
- CriterionForum.org

"This Arrow release gives Sisters the respect it deserves, with strong supplemental features – a lengthy video essay the clear highlight."
- Totalfilm.com

"A fantastic watch. Very well-done by Justin Humphreys."
- Razorwire Reviews

“The extras, listed in full below are excellent, with Justin Humphreys’s efficiently comprehensive 47-minute visual essay being the standout.”
- Frightfest.co.uk

Shut The Fuck Up and Stay Home: An Open Letter From All the Intelligent Moviegoers of the World to the Cackling Morons That Ruin Screenings in Hollywood

Over the last fifteen years, there has been a steadily rising tide of complete and utter twits who come to pre-1980 movies just to mock, laugh at, and otherwise deride them. This is the equivalent of paying to see something to bully it, and bullying it is--low, juvenile, and ass-backwards behavior from alleged human beings.

Why do these people pay to see old movies at all? If you don't respect or like them, why see them? If you don't like ballet, do you go see one and holler out "Your arabesques suck!" with a bunch of your spoiled, emaciated, bearded pals and guffaw like a complete yahoo? If you hate football, do you go to the Super Bowl and shriek "That pass was so-o-o-o shitty!" during the odd quiet moment? The difference is that movies have always been considered "entertainment" and not art by Americans and therefore unworthy of serious consideration. Francois Truffaut pointed that everyone has two jobs: their regular job and movie critic. This has never been truer than now, and never have people had less right to consider themselves worthy of the title.Going to old movies just to ridicule them is like booing your own team.

What specifically got me riled about this horrible trend was two recent screenings in Hollywood: Jacques Tourneur's CAT PEOPLE and the Film Noir TENSION. These are not MY FRIENDS NEED KILLING or AMERICAN NINJA movies--these are real movies, well worth the appreciation and polite attention of adults. This isn't MST3K territory. It goes without saying that CAT PEOPLE is phenomenal--a masterful example of how far a low budget and enormous amounts of talent and imagination can go. TENSION was a decent Film Noir--not a masterpiece, but a solid film. Yet the audiences laughed. And laughed. And laughed. And then laughed some more. This is the kind of behavior that makes Easterners look down their nose at L.A.--these audiences reflect badly on their town, behaving like a bunch of hick philistines.What made this all the more disturbing and insulting was that it was obviously a REVIVAL screening, and therefore any audience member with a grain of sense would have realized that the fashions, speech, social mores, etc. of the periods in which the films took place would be different than those of their own benighted time. But, no: they couldn't stifle their horrible, selfish desire to be undeservedly seen and noticed at all times or their flagrant stupidity for the 80- or 90-minutes that the films each ran. Instead, they make going to the movies feel like riding the subway.

What astounded me even more was hearing an audience laugh at the Boris Karloff version of THE MUMMY at a recent screening. One particular moment was astonishing--a bunch of drips in the audience cracked up when Karloff's Ardath Bey entreats a character not to touch him, explaining that it's "An Eastern prejudice." It's a fact that certain very, very strict Muslims and Jews at the time the film was made felt that being touched by someone outside of their faith makes them unclean, forcing them go through a complex purification ritual. (In the film, it's a cover for the fact that Karloff's character is partially disintegrating.) In a town that prides itself on multiculturalism, this sort of audience response seems acutely embarrassing.

What utter lack of comprehension makes the rubes who behave like this think it's OK--that that's how you should comport yourself in public? And what makes them superior to these films? What have they actually accomplished that can BEGIN to equal those movies? What works of art have they brought into the world that could come close to even Jacques Tourneur's least film (which CAT PEOPLE sure as hell isn't) or the lowliest film noir? And these aren't isolated incidents. These jabbering trolls are everywhere. They are just another symptom of America's lack of interest in its own history--and its lack of effort at understanding or contextualizing our history--and, worse still, the breakdown of any kind of common courtesy or consideration for other people.

Speaking for the moviegoers of the world to the people who laugh incessantly through old movies in public, WE HATE YOU, you boorish morons. You are incapable of an adult thought. You are a pack of inbreds. You spoil what should be a joyous experience and a treat. Your affected jadedness conceals a deep insecurity--if you had any self-respect, you would gladly show enthusiasm for something publicly that didn't involve having a mob of cretins like yourself behind you. I can't heap enough contempt on you. How hard is it to laugh WITH a movie and not AT it?

Go home. Stay there. Play in traffic. Do ANYTHING but come to great old movies.You don't deserve them.